How to tell if there is spyware on your phone (and what to do without putting yourself at risk)
In short: if someone knows things you have only said by message, or knows where you have been, they may be monitoring your phone. Sometimes it is spyware, but very often it is simpler: they know your account password or your location is being shared without you knowing. Before you touch anything, think about your safety: if he has access to your phone and you suddenly shut everything off, he will notice. Talk to a specialist domestic abuse service first.
Signs that may make you suspicious
- He knows things you haven’t told him: conversations, plans, who you have met.
- He knows where you are or where you have been without you telling him.
- Your phone has been in his hands: he gave it to you, set it up for you or knows your unlock code.
- Technical signs, which are weak clues: the battery drains much faster, it uses more data, it gets warm when idle or there are apps you don’t recognise.
None of these signs on its own is proof. The first one, however, is the most reliable of all.
Before you check anything, read this
- If you live with him or he watches you closely, don’t delete anything straight away. If he suddenly stops seeing what he used to see, he will notice, and that can make the situation worse.
- Do your research on another device: a friend’s, a work phone or a public computer.
- If you find something, take screenshots before touching it. Installing spyware on someone else’s phone is illegal, and those screenshots can be evidence.
- A specialist service can help you decide when and how to do it safely.
How to check on Android
- Settings → Apps: turn on “show system apps” and look for names you don’t recognise or that imitate system services (“Sync Services”, “System Update”…).
- Device admin apps (in Settings → Security): a lot of spyware hides there because it makes it harder to uninstall.
- Accessibility and notification access: an unknown app with these permissions can read everything that appears on the screen.
- Google Play Protect: Play Store → profile picture → Play Protect → Scan. It detects many known monitoring apps.
How to check on iPhone
- On iPhone, spyware apps are rare. The most common situation is that someone knows your Apple Account password and sees your backups, photos or location from another device.
- Safety Check (Settings → Privacy & Security), on iOS 16 or later: Apple built it with intimate partner abuse in mind. It shows who you share your location and data with, and has an “Emergency Reset” that cuts everything off at once. Keep in mind that he will notice that too.
- Devices signed in to your Apple Account (Settings → your name): check whether any of them isn’t yours.
- Profiles (Settings → General → VPN & Device Management): if there is one you didn’t install, be suspicious.
It isn’t always an app
- Shared accounts: if he knows your Google or Apple password, he can see everything without installing anything.
- Shared location: in Google Maps, Find My or “family” apps. Sometimes it was turned on long ago and nobody remembers.
- Trackers such as AirTags, in your bag or car. iPhone warns you if you are carrying one that isn’t yours, and Android also detects unknown trackers.
When it is safe to clean up
- Change your passwords (Google, Apple, email, social media) from a clean device and turn on two-step verification.
- Remove devices and sessions that aren’t yours.
- If there was spyware, the safest option is a factory reset without restoring the backup, or a new phone.
And Silncy?
If your phone is being monitored, any app you install can be seen, Silncy included. In that situation, talk to a specialist service before installing it. If you are experiencing domestic abuse, several European countries also offer an official, free alarm device: we explain it in panic buttons for women facing domestic abuse.
Resources
- 112 — emergencies anywhere in the EU (999 in the UK).
- Ireland: Women’s Aid 24-hour National Freephone Helpline, 1800 341 900.
- United Kingdom: National Domestic Abuse Helpline, 0808 2000 247 (24 h, free).
- Stop Stalkerware (stopstalkerware.org) — international coalition with guides on spotting and dealing with stalkerware.
FAQ
If I delete the spyware, will he know?
Probably: he will stop receiving data. That is why, if you live with him or he watches you closely, you need a plan with a specialist service first.
Can spyware read WhatsApp?
If it has accessibility or notification permissions, it can read what appears on the screen, including messages.
Is it a crime for him to put an app on my phone?
Yes. Accessing someone else’s phone without permission to monitor them is illegal across Europe. Keep the evidence and talk to a specialist service or the police.
Does a factory reset fix it?
It removes the apps, but if he knows your account password he can get back in. Change your passwords first, from a clean device.
This article is for information only. If you are in danger, call 112 (EU) or 999 (UK). Your national helpline for women experiencing violence can help you plan your safety.